Let Down (Your Hair)

SYNOPSIS: It’s been seven months since Rhuba came up with the idea of making a short film to pass the time while bored on the ship. They’re finally approaching the last few scenes.

CILA – Rapunzel
RHUBA – director/camera
CAP’N– Prince Charming
BIGBY – Trees/horses
REYNARD– Other characters/horses
DELL – other characters/stage direction 

INT – PEACESHOOTER:

In a special room on board of the Peaceshooter, the crew get ready to finish their slow-moving short film based on the old fable of Rapunzel.

BIGBY stands tall with his arms out as DELL takes his measurements.

BIGBY:
Have heard that this story is an Old Earthern Fairytale. Is that true?

Dell bristles but doesn’t have time to answer as REYNARD cuts her off. He is polishing the horse’s carriage.

REYNARD:
Hah! Earthers with their ego-centric beliefs. Rapunzel isn’t just a story, sapling. She’s real and has been around longer than their entire planet. You’re probably the only one who didn’t know that.

Bigby shrugs his monolithic shoulders and Dell scrambles to accommodate.

BIGBY:
Don’t get out much.

Reynard looks up at him and grins predatorily, definitely plotting up some scheme.   

REYNARD:
You know, sapling, maybe on our next scout we could change that, hm? I’ll take you and my man JP out for a night on the town. . . er, galaxy.

JP walks in, sipping a beverage of some sort. It looks warm; it’s steaming. He isn’t participating in the movie-making, and likes to make it seem like some unnecessary, childish hobby. In reality, he’s probably the most excited to see it finished. Also, he hasn’t told them, but he makes sure to keep an eye out to make sure that nobody hurts themselves.

JP:
Like hell you are! Last time you took me out with you I had to fix three of your broken bones!

Reynard looks expectantly at Bigby after being shot down by JP.

BIGBY:
Prefer to stay and work on the ship.

Reynard pouts, a sour mood overcoming him. He stops working on the carriage and gets up to stretch.

REYNARD:
Whatever, you big babies. If you haven’t noticed, JP, fixing bones is your job.

JP (hissing):
You’re just lucky I’m not a dog, or you’d find them buried at the bottom of the greenhouse.

JP sips from his cup coolly, but Bigby and Dell can both see that he’s losing his composure.

REYNARD:
Big threats from a little pussy-cat!

JP:
That’s it, come here you little shi—

Everyone stops as CAP’N comes walking into the room, dressed very sharply, with LOBSTER I on his shoulder. His hair is tied back into a short, prince-like ponytail with a ribbon, and you can tell that he is feeling quite handsome.

CAP’N:
Now, what’s this? JP, you know better than to let Reynard rile you up. He’s perfected the art of annoyance since he was a little pup.

From off-screen, you hear a indignant protest coming from Reynard. JP just grumbles and goes back to staring into his mug.

CAP’N (cont’d):
Dell, have you seen my royal Prince boots? I can’t find them for the life of me.

The next panel is panned down to Cap’n’s legs to see that he’s wearing some mis-matched socks on his feet. They are patched up and rough around the edges, but have some mysterious phrases and symbols on them. . . possibly an insight to his past.

Dell leaves Bigby for a second, and rummages around the costume closet (which is more just like a pile of clothes that they’re using in the movie) and finds some kicked-off boots with the label “CAP’S BOOTS” stuck on the heels.

DELL:
Here you are, Cap’n. Where you left them last time.

CAP’N:
Ah, so it seems. Thank you. Crew, we’re going to need you in the studio in five! Reynard, on your best behaviour please.

REYNARD:
Yeah, yeah.

Reynard does a mock-salute as Cap’n walks out of the room, while Bigby and the others do some finishing touches on their costumes and props.


INT – STUDIO

RHUBA and CILA are in the studio already, standing in the makeshift “castle” that Rhuba and Bigby had made for the movie. Cila is dangling her head outside the castle window, with her hair up in braids to conceal its true length. Rhuba is huffing and puffing as she does some last-minute flourishes, and argues with Cila in the meanwhile.

RHUBA:
I’m telling you, it’s not going to reach!

CILA:
And I’m telling you, it’s going to reach! Rhuba, you have to trust me! It’s not your hair, it’s my hair, and I’m assuring you as the proud owner of my hair that it’s going to reach. If it doesn’t—

RHUBA:
WHEN it doesn’t. . .

CILA:
IF it doesn’t reach, then, then— I’ll clean the kitchen quarters for a week! Okay?

Rhuba gives her a very unamused, motherly look, putting all four hands on her hips.

CILA (cont’d):
Fine, a month! That’s how sure I am.

RHUBA (sighing):
Okay, okay. Now let’s get your princess Tiara on. . .

The rest of the crew (aside from JP) gather inside the studio, Cap’n leading the way. He is fully decked-out in his Prince gear, and looks eager to finish off the whole thing.

CAP’N:
All right, Rhuba, we need you down here for the shooting! Let’s finish this up, once and for all!

RHUBA:
Yes, sir!

CAP’N:
Cila, are you sure your hair’s going to reach the bottom of the castle?

CILA:
Oh my God, I’m sure! Let’s go!

The next panel looks like it’s being shot from the camera’s perspective (with the frame border/time/battery overlaying it).

RHUBA:
Aaand we’re rolling. Take One.

Cap’n rolls in with the horses and the carriage, a regal air about him. He exits grandly, standing below the castle.

CAP’N:
Rapunzel, please let down your hair .

RHUBA:
Cut! Cap’n, sir, with all due respect— could you, possibly, put a little bit more feeling into your lines?

Cap’n looks a little hurt, but tries to oblige. You can tell it took a dent to his ego.

CAP’N:
I thought I was doing all right? Well, anyway. . . (waiting for Rhuba’s ‘rolling!’) Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your shimmering blue hair!

CILA:
Of course, my love, and then we can live together happily ever after!

BIGBY as HORSE:
… neigh.

REYNARD as HORSE’S BUTT:

CAP’N:
Yeah, cool.

RHUBA:
Uh, cut! Cap’n! The love of your life is about to let down her hair to you, so you can finally meet her! I think that maybe you would benefit from being a little bit more emotional! Okay? Rolling!

There is a panel where you can see the Cap’n from his own perspective, and in his mind he is being a very emotional, very intense actor. (This is a very dramatic scene, make it as over the top as possible.) This is under the title “EXPECTATION”. To the right, the same scene is portrayed from the rest of the crew’s perspective, and you can see he is being very stoic and even a little cold. This is under the title of “REALITY”.

CAP’N:
My sweetest Rapunzel, I cannot wait to hold you in my arms!

Rhuba mumbles a relieved “phew” under her breath from behind the camera, and Cila starts to undo the plaits, sticking her head out further through the castle window. There is a moment of tension where everyone is silent, and then waves of hair are falling down the castle, cascading over the bricks. . .

And it barely reaches halfway.

CAP’N:
… my dear?

Cila looks mortified, like she can’t believe what’s happening, and everyone is all-around shocked. Nobody says anything for a few moments, all too let down by Cila’s hair.

Reynard takes off the back part of the horse’s costume while the cameras are rolling, obviously looking annoyed.

REYNARD:
Are you fucking kiddin’ me? We spent seven months on this gosu just so Rhuba could prove that Cila’s hair isn’t as long as Rapunzels?!

Bigby appears from the front of the horse’s costumes, not saying anything but obviously looking disappointed.

RHUBA:
I knew it! Little girl, I hope your long limbs are ready to scrub the kitchen top-to-toe!

The panel goes out of the camera-overlay thing and you just see Cila melting with embarrassment and Rhuba holding up a bucket of cleaning supplies looking very, very satisfied.

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